It's about 1:40am. I tried to fall asleep for like three hours so here I am listening to some soft slow music hoping I'll sleep in the chair because the bed certainly isn't doin it for me. I decided that maybe blogging would help me sleep better. I might have too many things in my head. It's been a very long, bad week for me.
First, I'll spare the details because I don't want to talk about it, but I broke someone's heart and I haven't done that before. So...while it was hard on him, it was most definitely hard on me, too. I'm not used to hurting people. I keep thinking about him and I do miss him but he's not for me. And though it's not the reason I called it off with him, I'm realizing more and more how much I want to be with Mike. I'm listening to Jessica Simpson's "I Wanna Love You Forever" just because I loved that song when it came out. I remember the first time I heard it. I was in middle school, pre-teeney bopper. So...I have an even better excuse to still listen to it. It was my pre-Me era, if I had such a thing. The words are making me think of him so much:
You set my soul at ease/chased darkness out of view/left your desperate spell on me/say you feel it too, i know you do/I've got so much more to give/this can't die, I yearn to live/pour yourself all over me/and I'll cherish every drop here on my knees
I wanna love you forever/and this is all I'm asking of you/ten thousand lifetimes together/is that so much for you to do/cuz from the moment that I saw your face/and felt the fire or your sweet embrace/I swear I knew...I wanna love you forever
My mind fails to understand/what my heart tells me to do/and I'd give up all I have just to be with you/and that would do/I've always been taught to win/and I never thought I'd fall/be at the mercy of a man/I've never been, now I only want to be right where you are
In my life I've learned that heaven never waits/let's take this now before it's gone/like yesterday/cuz when I'm with you there's nowhere else that I would ever wanna be/I'm breathing for the next second I can feel you/loving me/I'm gonna love...
So I guess this is me, still waiting. This is me, wishing for just one moment together so that I can tell you one thing, Mike. I want you to see it like I'm seeing it, because then you would understand and then you wouldn't walk away from me. It could be so brilliant if you only let it in. What are you afraid of?
Now that I've gotten that off of my chest, now for the long week. I've been on 12's like you wouldn't believe and it's so hard to find enough time for yourself to think good thoughts. I feel like I have to schedule time for myself to just think good thoughts because the bad or unpleasant ones come whether you have time for them or not. I feel so freakin lonely lately. Also, I hate that I wasted so much time in college. I hate that because now I'm payin for it in other ways. I'm not completely overwhelmed with studen loan payments that I can't afford all of my bills...I can,...but that's about it. I went to pick up my sister from work with mom. I drove, she wanted me to give her a bit of a refresher course on driving manually. On the way back from picking up Andrea, I went into Delavan because I need a new pillow, BADLY. Mom and Annie waited in the car for me. I found a pillow that was amazing, for like seven dollars...then I ran and grabbed a $4.50 Henley to contribute to the outfit we got for Evan's birthday...then I grabbed a Mountain Dew out of the cooler and checked out. I had my last $15 in my pocket until I get paid NEXT Friday. Stupid pillow rang up at $10.96...making the total $17.99. WTF?! I said I wanted a price check on the pillow and she told me she was too busy so I said fine. Fuck the goddamn pillow, take it off and I'll leave you to your other precious customers. I paid my $6 or so for the soda and shirt...and walked out. I cried the whole way home just because I couldn't pay for a fucking pillow. I'm getting teared up just thinking about it right now for some reason. It's just a fucking pillow. Why can't I afford a fucking pillow? And why am I crying over it? And how am I going to get to work and back next week with less than a quarter tank of gas? How am I going to feel when no one shows up for the surprise party I'm throwing mom and dad? I'm doing the planning all by myself because no one wants to help, I'm buying the cake and the balloon's...the brats and hot dogs, plates and cups, soda and ice...it adds up. I have this huge feeling that this insane amount of time I'm spending on these 52 invitations is going to be in vein because no one will show up for this party for my parents and it will all have been for nothing. No one will show up and no one will recognize the gesture I'm trying to make, no one will even bother to notice. What's worse is I have hardly slept all week. It's not like I haven't been tired enough. It's not that...I just can't fall asleep. I've worked so hard this week I'm tuckered out by the time I get in my car to go home, but somehow can't fall asleep. There are so many things I need to do to get ready for this damn party that no one will show up to and worked so hard on...how do you not throw a party or your parents when they are both turning 40 within two months of each other? My luck, I won't even be able to get them to the park to their own party because I can't come up with a good story to get them there at 11 because we usually don't play volleyball until 1:30. Thing is...we can't do the whole afternoon thing because we having bowling at 5. That means we need like two hours to clean up...hence the 11am start time. The real clencher? I don't get out of church until fucking quarter to 11. Brilliant. I may have to skip AGAIN. Maria is going to disown me, and next year when I get around to taking the classes and shit, she won't wanna be my sponsor for everything and getting baptized and all that...FUCK John Legend is not doing it for me right now....
It seems I've let myself down. I haven't been doing a good job of taking care of myself because I'm too worried about everything else. Maybe I'm just upset because I invited like five friends for a cookout and bonfire and while I was at work, everyone bagged out on me. Lonely. Then there was the stupid pillow thing...I know I planned on calling you tonight, Cat...but I was not in the mood. I was too busy trying to calm down and relax. It wasn't a soft cry, it was the can't-catch-your-breath kind, worked-up, kind. I needed someone stroking my hair or holding my face something but I'm so LONELY. Great friends. They expect me to show up to the things they plan...but when I try and get something together, no one shows. Real nice, guys. I really need you now, something to hold onto and give me a false idea that maybe I'm not lonely...and you fuck up majorly. That is the biggest let down ever, the worst feeling. Making plans, but having everyone back out of them. It happens to me all of the time. Here I go all worked up again, I'm out. I'll try and call you in the morning or something, Cat. I love you, and I would love to hear your voice. Goodnight everyone.
Friday, August 31, 2007
Wooo!
Guess what...I get to go home early tonight! Everyone at work gets to work six hours but get paid for eight today! How awesome is that?! It means that I can call Cat and catch up...it means Stephanie is coming over to grill out. It's only fair, I ate at her parents' house last weekend! Also, my friend Kendra might come over to grill out, too. She posted a bulletin on myspace about wanting to do something, but that she had no plans. So...I invited her over and we will see if she wants to. I have the suspicion she's just trying to keep herself busy at this point. He lost her mother to an evasive cancer of some sort, a week or two ago. So...we're hanging out. I just hope that our family setting here doesn't upset her and remind her of her mother too much to stay and try to have some fun.
Currently listening to Eminem's Toy Soldier. Really great song. He's a pretty amazing lyricist, and he is the KING of multisyllabic rhymes. It amazes me. I'm not always in the mood for him but I will never deny his talent!
Zoey says hello! She's beautifully perched in my lap...just sittin there, swinging her tail...tolerating my occassional stroke. I love my Zoey. Oh...now she's sitting in my window, looking all pretty and graceful. Awwwwww.
I'm absolutely thrilled about this next month. I'm going to TWO Brewer's games. One with the family on the 15th and one with Stephanie on the 29th. Also...this weekend is a party for Evan's first birthday which was a couple of days ago...and also a baptism. It looks like the baptism is at the house...so then I'm lead to wonder if their friend, Paul, is doing the service. He's recently become a minister or is still in school for it or something...anyway, this guy is great. He's really awesome, and smart, and he's so proud of his 2 year old son, Elliot..and he's fun to drink with (not that I've done it legally yet...). He and his wife used to live in Minneapolis and when Jill and Rob came up to see me, they stayed at their house and welcomed me into their lives with wide open arms. Paul and Kathy also drove me home for Thanksgiving while I was up at school. I had no way of getting home because Pete and Dorothy weren't going for some reason. Jill told me about Paul and told him I needed a ride home otherwise I'd be stuck in the streets as the close the dorm down for certain holidays...Thanksgiving was one of them.....(that was the biggest run-on sentence ever haha). So...they gave me a ride home because they were heading south and 14 was close enough to my home, and easy enough for them to get to their final destination....Paul drove, Kathy, who was preggers at the time, gave up the front seat and I complained about it the whole way. Why on earth would a pregnant woman give up her shotgun seat, to sit in the back, crammed, and very uncomfortable from the pregnancy....whatever. Goofy people. I'm getting off topic...which is Evan's party thing. On top of seeing Paul, I get to see Pete and Dorothy and the munchkins! OMG...it just hit me that Rick and Kathy are probably going to be there, too. DAMN!
Alright...I have stuff to do, enough of being a bum. Until I have more to write, keep me in your thoughts. Feeling very lonely these days. Much love to everyone.
Currently listening to Eminem's Toy Soldier. Really great song. He's a pretty amazing lyricist, and he is the KING of multisyllabic rhymes. It amazes me. I'm not always in the mood for him but I will never deny his talent!
Zoey says hello! She's beautifully perched in my lap...just sittin there, swinging her tail...tolerating my occassional stroke. I love my Zoey. Oh...now she's sitting in my window, looking all pretty and graceful. Awwwwww.
I'm absolutely thrilled about this next month. I'm going to TWO Brewer's games. One with the family on the 15th and one with Stephanie on the 29th. Also...this weekend is a party for Evan's first birthday which was a couple of days ago...and also a baptism. It looks like the baptism is at the house...so then I'm lead to wonder if their friend, Paul, is doing the service. He's recently become a minister or is still in school for it or something...anyway, this guy is great. He's really awesome, and smart, and he's so proud of his 2 year old son, Elliot..and he's fun to drink with (not that I've done it legally yet...). He and his wife used to live in Minneapolis and when Jill and Rob came up to see me, they stayed at their house and welcomed me into their lives with wide open arms. Paul and Kathy also drove me home for Thanksgiving while I was up at school. I had no way of getting home because Pete and Dorothy weren't going for some reason. Jill told me about Paul and told him I needed a ride home otherwise I'd be stuck in the streets as the close the dorm down for certain holidays...Thanksgiving was one of them.....(that was the biggest run-on sentence ever haha). So...they gave me a ride home because they were heading south and 14 was close enough to my home, and easy enough for them to get to their final destination....Paul drove, Kathy, who was preggers at the time, gave up the front seat and I complained about it the whole way. Why on earth would a pregnant woman give up her shotgun seat, to sit in the back, crammed, and very uncomfortable from the pregnancy....whatever. Goofy people. I'm getting off topic...which is Evan's party thing. On top of seeing Paul, I get to see Pete and Dorothy and the munchkins! OMG...it just hit me that Rick and Kathy are probably going to be there, too. DAMN!
Alright...I have stuff to do, enough of being a bum. Until I have more to write, keep me in your thoughts. Feeling very lonely these days. Much love to everyone.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
7 Pointers to lift a bad mood
I pulled this off of Yahoo today and thought that a lot of people can benefit from this, and if not it is because they already know about it! Enjoy!
Dr. Mao's Secrets of Longevity
Going Up! 7 Pointers to Lift a Bad Mood
Posted by Dr. Maoshing Ni
on Mon, Aug 27, 2007, 10:16 pm PDT
No one can live a long and healthy life without the will to go on; sometimes mood swings can make us feel that life is too much for us.
A bad mood not only gives you a gloomy outlook, it also lowers your immune function, leading the way to illness. Here are some suggestions to lift your mood, your spirit, and your health.
1. A Laughing Matter
"Laugh Therapy," pioneered by Norman Cousins, has turned out to have real substance. Research has discovered that laughter and joy boost immune functions, especially the production of the natural killer cells that help defend the body from illness and cancer.
Laughter also increases the release of endorphins - compounds that give you a sense of well-being - in your brain. Without a doubt, joyful people liver longer and healthier lives. So read your favorite comics, watch your favorite comedies, and laugh it up!
2. Amino Acid for Restored Mindset
When an imbalance or deficiency is creating a bad mood, the Europeans use supplements of a natural compound found in human cells to regulate mood and restore a healthy mindset. SAMe (S-adenosyl-L-methionine) is produced from methionine, an amino acid that plays a role in the production of uplifting neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine.
One study indicated that SAMe worked on patients who had unsuccessful results with conventional antidepressants. To get a boost from SAMe, take a supplement combining it with vitamins B6 and B12.
3. Hands-On Healing
Human touch increases the production of endorphins, growth hormone, and DHEA, all of which lengthen your life span and lower the negative impact of stress. Studies have found that patients who are regularly touched recover faster than those who are not touched. So give someone a hug and feel both of your moods improve.
4. Boost Your "Youth Hormones"
You don't need pills to flood your body with a rejuvenating flood of growth hormones. Research has found that doing squats and leg presses will greatly increase your natural production of the "youth hormone". Increased growth hormone translates to an elevated mood, among other physical benefits. Keep it up with weight training, knee bends, push-ups, and rowing.
5. Take a Bracing Breath
Breathing correctly is important for dispelling the toxins and wastes from your body; in fact, it is estimated that we expel only about 30 percent of toxins in our bodies through the bowels and bladder-the rest is all respiratory. Breathing is also a great way to clear your mind, boost your energy, and improve your mood. Practice deep, slow, rhythmic, breathing daily with mind-body disciplines such as tai chi, yoga, qigong, and meditation.
6. Smell the Joy
Research has shown that smell has a definite impact on our bodies and minds. When you stimulate the olfactory nerves inside your nose, you activate the limbic system of your brain, which is associated with moods and memory. This concept is instrumental to aromatherapy, a natural health tradition that makes use of the healing powers of plants with strong scents.
Aromatherapy recommends treating depression with jasmine, eucalyptus for exhilaration, and grapefruit to increase alertness and joy. Just put a dab of the essential oils from these plants on your temples, back of your neck, or acupressure points. Another option? Boil the herb in water and inhale the steam through your nose.
7. Feel Fine with Flowers
There is a reason that flowers are the traditional get-well gesture. Colorful flowers have a powerful influence on moods; they can uplift a patient's mood and even combat stress. One study found that during a five-minute typing assignment, people sitting next to a flowering bouquet were more relaxed than those who sat near foliage-only plants.
I hope these tips help the good feelings flow! I invite you to visit often and share your own personal health and longevity tips with me. May you live long, live strong, and live happy!-Dr. Mao
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Dr. Mao's Secrets of Longevity
Going Up! 7 Pointers to Lift a Bad Mood
Posted by Dr. Maoshing Ni
on Mon, Aug 27, 2007, 10:16 pm PDT
No one can live a long and healthy life without the will to go on; sometimes mood swings can make us feel that life is too much for us.
A bad mood not only gives you a gloomy outlook, it also lowers your immune function, leading the way to illness. Here are some suggestions to lift your mood, your spirit, and your health.
1. A Laughing Matter
"Laugh Therapy," pioneered by Norman Cousins, has turned out to have real substance. Research has discovered that laughter and joy boost immune functions, especially the production of the natural killer cells that help defend the body from illness and cancer.
Laughter also increases the release of endorphins - compounds that give you a sense of well-being - in your brain. Without a doubt, joyful people liver longer and healthier lives. So read your favorite comics, watch your favorite comedies, and laugh it up!
2. Amino Acid for Restored Mindset
When an imbalance or deficiency is creating a bad mood, the Europeans use supplements of a natural compound found in human cells to regulate mood and restore a healthy mindset. SAMe (S-adenosyl-L-methionine) is produced from methionine, an amino acid that plays a role in the production of uplifting neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine.
One study indicated that SAMe worked on patients who had unsuccessful results with conventional antidepressants. To get a boost from SAMe, take a supplement combining it with vitamins B6 and B12.
3. Hands-On Healing
Human touch increases the production of endorphins, growth hormone, and DHEA, all of which lengthen your life span and lower the negative impact of stress. Studies have found that patients who are regularly touched recover faster than those who are not touched. So give someone a hug and feel both of your moods improve.
4. Boost Your "Youth Hormones"
You don't need pills to flood your body with a rejuvenating flood of growth hormones. Research has found that doing squats and leg presses will greatly increase your natural production of the "youth hormone". Increased growth hormone translates to an elevated mood, among other physical benefits. Keep it up with weight training, knee bends, push-ups, and rowing.
5. Take a Bracing Breath
Breathing correctly is important for dispelling the toxins and wastes from your body; in fact, it is estimated that we expel only about 30 percent of toxins in our bodies through the bowels and bladder-the rest is all respiratory. Breathing is also a great way to clear your mind, boost your energy, and improve your mood. Practice deep, slow, rhythmic, breathing daily with mind-body disciplines such as tai chi, yoga, qigong, and meditation.
6. Smell the Joy
Research has shown that smell has a definite impact on our bodies and minds. When you stimulate the olfactory nerves inside your nose, you activate the limbic system of your brain, which is associated with moods and memory. This concept is instrumental to aromatherapy, a natural health tradition that makes use of the healing powers of plants with strong scents.
Aromatherapy recommends treating depression with jasmine, eucalyptus for exhilaration, and grapefruit to increase alertness and joy. Just put a dab of the essential oils from these plants on your temples, back of your neck, or acupressure points. Another option? Boil the herb in water and inhale the steam through your nose.
7. Feel Fine with Flowers
There is a reason that flowers are the traditional get-well gesture. Colorful flowers have a powerful influence on moods; they can uplift a patient's mood and even combat stress. One study found that during a five-minute typing assignment, people sitting next to a flowering bouquet were more relaxed than those who sat near foliage-only plants.
I hope these tips help the good feelings flow! I invite you to visit often and share your own personal health and longevity tips with me. May you live long, live strong, and live happy!-Dr. Mao
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Monday, August 27, 2007
Heavy sighing from the Rin-baby
I feel lonely. I have Stephanie that I can hang out with all the time and everything, but all of my good friends are nowhere near where I am, and they have their own lives that I'm not so much a part of anymore. Beth is in Omaha and will not let me see her. Randee is three hours away and it's not like I can just take off any time I want to go and see her. Then there's Leanne, who is in town, but an incredibly busy person, that I have to see while she's at work at the bowling alley or at the ballpark. She's got her own family, her own thing goin on. Then there's my Minnesota second family. They're even farther than Randee, and it's even harder to make it up to see them than it is to see Randee. Jim and Cat are only an hour away but they're so freakin busy bein an awesome couple and having jobs and school and photo shoots...and then I find myself getting jealous when I hear about them going to Pete and Dorothy's for random weekends because I used to have the privelege to be a part of that wonderful bond industrial strength friendship thing they have goin on and from my own decision to come back home instead of stay in school up there, I get to hear about it instead of be a part of it anymore. It's hard because I miss that so freakin much. So, I don't really have a right to feel the jealousy or to miss it, because it is the affect of my own decisions, but I feel it anyway. I used to be this special thing in their group, like they all were a special piece to the gang. They still all have their soft spots for their dearest Rinner, but it just isn't the same. I'm not in the gang anymore. The first time that realization hit me it came crashing into me like a Mack truck, when we were at the Wilderness in February. I can't say I regret my decision to come back home because to regret something is to say you didn't learn something from it. But that doesn't mean I am not constantly wondering why I made the decision, why I didn't stick it out regardless of knowing I'd have been a full-time student, overcoming the most emotional obstacle I've ever endured, while still having a job and trying to find enough money to stay in school-all at the same time. I don't think I had it in me. I wonder on a daily basis what it would be like for me now, if I were still there, if I had stayed. I can't help but literally, physically weap, sob, cry, whatever you want to call it, over how good it would still be even now. It's an emotional pain I still carry with me and a decision I question all the time. I want it back so that I could stick i out, but hindsight is always 20/20. It always makes the right decisions, it always laughs and smiles and feels happy and loved. But, it is not forgiving. It is not erased, and it is not redone. I get to live with this the rest of my life, wanting where I would have ended up, so much more than where I am now. They say money makes you happy because you can have the things you want for your life. But now, I have money and I want back the days in Minnesota, when I didn't have money. I'd take it all back. I'd take the struggling student life back again in a heartbeat. I'd mold myself into that writer, or that musician...or that teacher, or that business woman, or that accountant. I love LOVE to learn. I love school. I can't go back now to any kind of schooling until my loans are paid off because they will not redefer. So I am feeling the affects of my decision, daily. Every cup of coffee reminds me of weekends at Pete and Dorothy's when I brought all of my books to study and do homework, while they'd pop in to refill my coffee cup without my asking. Every time I see someone playing frisbee reminds me of how my roommates and I would walk down to the grassy area by the river to throw it around. Every single fucking time I play volleyball it reminds me of playin in the afternoons in the quad witha nyone who wanted to play...usually it was the outgoing guys from our floor of the dorm, with their shirts off, bein goofy talkin smack, and then wrestling us to the ground just to hear us laugh. I remember running to Chipotle in the rain two blocks away, wrapped like burritos in bedsheets, just to get free burritos on Tuesdays. I remember Lesbian Thursday's, and goin to club Spin, and Spring Jam, and walking back from Italian with Marco...I remember stopping at the corner convenience store almost every day after Italian to get some juice or crackers or Lunchables or chips...or soup or something. I remember lugging three full laundry baskets at once up and down three flights of stairs with a backpack on my back full of papers for my English comp. class, and a few bank Yahzee sheets and my ipod. I remember the squish squash sound of the flip flips after we got out of the shower because we didn't dare shower without them. I remember dinner at 5 sharp with Al and Mal and Myatta, even though we complained about the food every day. I remember choosing our table carefully so we could watch everyone that came in to eat, as we had names and fake life commentaries for the people we recognized and nick named....Like Chip N Dales dancer, Serial killer, Frisbee God, etc. I miss walking back to class wondering if Cat was waiting for me online...I liked getting cd's and care packages in the mail from her. I lived for those days. I lived too, for the weekends they'd be up when I was at my aunt and uncle's house. I'd play silly yard games with my cousins and then they'd go to bed eventually and I got to sit up with Jim and Cat, and my aunt and uncle and be an adult and smoke stoggies and drink cosmos and homebrew and red wine. At some point in the night I'd go lay under the stars, or someone would rub my shoulders, or I would get to hold Cat from behind and whisper that I wish I could hold her like that forever. Back then I thought those days would last forever, but maybe even through that I was scared to admit that I REALLY knew that they wouldn't last forever. I remember my first real hug I gave Cat, on the weekend she came without Jim to go to the Ren Fair with us...I remember leaning my head on her shoulder that weekend and it was almost as if I could feel through her skin how touched she was by that. Now she's just used to it from me. I remember crying in the parking lot of San Pedro's on another weekend when we had to say goodbye and she held me and that was the first time of many that she whispered as she stroked my hair "It's okay, I gotcha, breathe..." We carved pumpkings in the front yard that weekend. I remember Dorothy asking me to go grocery shopping with her sometimes and knowing that if I said no she'd guilt me into saying yes, and then she'd buy me stuff and I didn't know how to thank her. I remember how I said after every mean she served me, "thank you. It is very good." I remember the weekend the kids and Pete were gone and it was just her and me. I went to dinner with her and a friend of hers for sushi and she asked me to drive because she wanted to drink more wine. I remember that night watching Oprah with her in the dark while I laid my head in her lap because she wanted to run her fingers through my hair. I remember how she answered the phone for me when I was in the bathroom because it was Beth and she knew how much I loved talking to her and that it was a weekend event for me. I remember all the restaurants they took me to...all the visits to the apple orchard, all the trips to Target, all the times Dorothy had relatives up for the weekend and begged me to be there because it somehow made her less stressed about the whole thing...I remember the couple of times she sent me howlers, and I remember how she talked me into my first therapist. I remember my Freshman Comp. class being my favorite because I absolutely loved my teacher and I can't imagine having taken it with anyone else...and I remember taking Poetry 1 and 2 because she was teaching them. I remember that I was her favorite student she's ever had because she said she loved the light in my eyes and my passion for learning, and that I didn't expect an A because that' what I've always gotten, that I went to class every day expecting to work for it. I remember her telling me she cried when she read my final paper because I had come so far and worked so hard that it made her feel like a success as a teacher. I remember how she tried to cover the fact that she was crying when I told her I was pregnant, and leaving school...then she treated me to lunch. I still talk to her by the way....I remember taking the 16 to Nicolett Mall in downtown Minneapolis to go to the Target there or the movie theatre. I remember taking my bike across the Mississippi bridge to get to the West Bank for my maps and geography class. I remember the excessive notes I took, and that I was brilliant at the subject due to my math skills, but that I hated it, for the very reason that it was math oriented and I hate math. I remember the crunching of the leaves in fall when I rode my bike on the other side of the bridge on the way back. I remember the day someone stole my bike even though it didn't have a seat because I took it off and took it with me when I locked it up. I remember everything as if I'm still in those days. I want them back and I miss the people that meant the most to me in those days. My aunt and uncle, my cousins, and Jim and Cat. I miss them even though I can talk to them whenever I want. I miss being such an active part of their lives. They're still the people that mean the most to me, but it will never be like it was then. And I can't have those days back, so in missing it as much as I do, I'm feeling more lonely every day. The writing of this blog is mostly for myself, and so I don't mind, or even care, that people who read this, will most likely read the beginning, then skip to the end to read this bit, and my close. I miss those days painfully, and I miss the feelings I had back then. Take me back to the days where class was more important than sleep and food. I'd take those days back any day.
Friday, August 24, 2007
Yay!
So the speakers I was gonna pick up at best buy got discontinued, and I ended up getting Randee her tattoo she's wanted. I also ended up getting another one myself on my ankle. It's a treble clef. I love it because it means a lot to me. I'm proud of it and I'm glad to show it off but it's kinda bloody right now so it doesn't look the greatest. I'll post some pictures tomorrow on myspace so everyone can see it. ;D I'll post Randee's too. It's pretty hot. Anyway, that's all for now. I'll probably blog more later, drunk. Hasta!
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Blog-happy
An explanation to the title of the blog is quite simple...I have plenty to blog about. As a reference to myself, here's a list of what I'd like to write about/soap box: football, bullshit drama, boys, and my brother (who is indeed, a boy, but is a subject all his own for this blog)
First things first: Bullshit drama. I'll simply copy an paste my bulletin from myspace, rather than retype it all. Forgive the lack of intelligent writing of any kind for this part. I was pissed off and the writing style was the last thing on my mind. Here it is ---> You'd think that at some point, people would grow up. I guess I have high expectations though. As a result of ME telling Amanda that her cousin is no longer welcome at our house due to rudeness, Amanda is no longer allowed to hang out with Andrea. Which is fine, because they like to talk behind Andrea's back and she doesn't need untruthful friends anyway..but the point is...Amanda's mother decided to punish Amanda and Andrea for her cousins' rudeness. What was so rude do you ask? Now before I go into it, know that her cousin does not know us at all. She was over with Amanda on Thursday because she wanted pictures taken. While they were over, she made comments about our animals, and about my mother...and she doesn't even know us. "Your dog is fat." He is far from it. He's healthy. Just because he's not skinny miny does not make him fat. "I don't like that cat." YOU DON'T KNOW THAT CAT! Sundae jumped up onto the table and while I started to pet her, that is what she said. And I argued with her about the Louie being fat thing but it doesn't matter...she still said it. And you don't talk about my sister negatively in front of me IN MY HOUSE. Especially if you hardly know her, have maybe seen her less than a handful of times. You DO NOT come into my house making judgements. We don't know you. And now, we don't like you and you are no longer welcome. I think that makes sense and I think it is fair. What isn't fair, is for Amanda's mother to punish my SISTER for it, who wasn't even out of bed while the girls were over here. I'd gesture that anyone else, but for the involved party, would agree with me. Grow up. And learn some manners.
Next, is football. Year after year I find that I love it even more. In previous years, I was never able to just sit and watch a random football game, let aloe get into it. The only games that would excite me would The Badgers, and respectively, the Packers. I'm writing this blog while lounging on the couch watching Denver and Dallas do battle in a preseason game.Right before this game the Steelers played the Redskins. Now, I admit it's on as background noise/distraction, but I'm still kinda getting into it. As for the Badgers, I have no idea when they play, if they have yet, and when their season starts, but I assure you I'd rather watch them than the Packers some days. The Packers had spectacular game last night in which they played particularly well as a team, even with different quarterbacks and other people coming in and out, trying to find a nice rhythm. It was pretty awesome. I only saw the first half, but from what I hear, the whole show was really awesome. I'm reminded a bit of last year for new years when the Packer's whomped on the Bears. As if the holiday weren't sufficient drinking fuel, the Packer's and the Bear's made it twice as jolly. I love this time of year. The weather is finally hinting at a cool-down. I love sweatshirt season. Bowling starts in a few weeks...and we get really lucky when either the Packer game or Badger game is going on DURING bowling. They put up plasma tv's a couple years ago and I love to get into the game and have fun bowling at the same time. This year I can kick back and enjoy a few beers, too. Yay. I'd love to make it to a game in Green Bay. Unfortunately I am poor. However...should anyone feel the need to donate anything to the cause, I'll gladly accept :P
Now onto the boys part. Why, after two years, do I have them crawling ALL OVER?! Yeah, that is correct. I just admitted I've been single (without so much as a kiss on the cheek, mind you) for two full years, almost three now. There are two great guys in La Crosse that want to meet me next weekend. They are both friends of Randee and AJ's and they are both really great guys. Josh has been texting me quite a bit since last night :) Anywho...he's the one that may or may not be there to see me this weekend. He's goin away but depending on when I leave on Sunday, may be back in time to at least meet me. The other one, Ben, is hittin the bars with us. Jen, Randee, and myself are headin out, then AJ, Ben, and some other buddies will be joinin us later on. On top of these two...I went out to Elgin last night to this Cadillac something or other bar place with a huge dance floor...Saturday nights they do country so there were line dancers goin all night. We lost track of time and I got home really late, but now I am getting side-tracked. We met Stephanie's friend Marco down there, and his buddy, Ryne. This guy was pretty cool. Ryne was kinda geeky, but comfortable, talkative, goofy-a bit like me, but more geeky than I like. Anyway, we danced (at which point I had already had two or three beers). The second slow song, he went for it and kissed me. Now, I can't tell you whether I did it because I liked him enough to, or if it was because it has been so fucking long and it was sooooo nice...but I'm leaning towards the later unfortunately. He got my number though so we will see. Josh has my number though, too. And he made the first move, technically! Ugh. Decisions decisons. Just seeing who everyone is right now...getting to know new people. I am going to La Crosse next weekend with an open mind and no attachments.
Now, onto the really touchy topic that has me really really steamed. Wednesday I told Mat that we were going to Kirsch's (the hoity toity restaurant Andrea is now hostessing at) for mom for her birthday, as a surprise, and he agreed. Today while sitting on the couch watching Wild Hogs, he asked if he could borrow it tonight. I'm like yeah, you goin somewhere? I was concerned about him losing a netflix movie. I'm not sure what there policy is on that, but I'll cross that road when I get there. He said Danielle (aka Elle, OTHER Danielle...) wanted him to go over and see her. Ooo as a side note let me mention this crazy bitch lost her license that she's had for a whole year or so...for speeding too many times. Dumbass. As Mat broke up with her on Tuesday, I was confused, but thought it wasn't my business. I don't care about his decisions with girls anymore, they're all the same. I asked him how late he was goin over there because the dinner thing for mom is at 6 (and I'd better wrap it up soon as I have no make up on yet and it's nearly 5:15). He said oh that is tonight isn't it. I assumed he'd call his EX...emphasis on EX...and cancel. Ten minutes later he's tearin down the road in his p.o.s. truck. I thought nothing of it, maybe he had a firecall or had to get gas or something. Turns out, he chose his EX over a dinner for mom's 40th birthday. That's a big birthday. Needless to say she's very upset about it...and I'm just livid. Absolutely livid. My respect for him was teetering on non-existent going into this asshole move, and now there's no doubt it's gone. What a fucking ass. It's your mother's birthday. He aslo had these dinner plans first. But...chose instead, to hang out with his ex girlfriend in Fort Fucking Atkinson. What a dumbass. I told him so, too. and He keeps trying to justify it...that we shoulda reminded him, that it's not his fault, that I'm a bitch, that he simply forgot...I DONT CARE IF YOU FUCKING FORGOT YOU JUST ROYALLY FUCKED UP in choosing youre ex over mom for her birthday. You have got to be kidding me. Dude. He does shit like this all the time. And he is and forever will be, a cocky ass. Mom agreed. So at least there is that, but that is not the point. I can't come up with a word vulgar enough to describe him. I have no words left.
First things first: Bullshit drama. I'll simply copy an paste my bulletin from myspace, rather than retype it all. Forgive the lack of intelligent writing of any kind for this part. I was pissed off and the writing style was the last thing on my mind. Here it is ---> You'd think that at some point, people would grow up. I guess I have high expectations though. As a result of ME telling Amanda that her cousin is no longer welcome at our house due to rudeness, Amanda is no longer allowed to hang out with Andrea. Which is fine, because they like to talk behind Andrea's back and she doesn't need untruthful friends anyway..but the point is...Amanda's mother decided to punish Amanda and Andrea for her cousins' rudeness. What was so rude do you ask? Now before I go into it, know that her cousin does not know us at all. She was over with Amanda on Thursday because she wanted pictures taken. While they were over, she made comments about our animals, and about my mother...and she doesn't even know us. "Your dog is fat." He is far from it. He's healthy. Just because he's not skinny miny does not make him fat. "I don't like that cat." YOU DON'T KNOW THAT CAT! Sundae jumped up onto the table and while I started to pet her, that is what she said. And I argued with her about the Louie being fat thing but it doesn't matter...she still said it. And you don't talk about my sister negatively in front of me IN MY HOUSE. Especially if you hardly know her, have maybe seen her less than a handful of times. You DO NOT come into my house making judgements. We don't know you. And now, we don't like you and you are no longer welcome. I think that makes sense and I think it is fair. What isn't fair, is for Amanda's mother to punish my SISTER for it, who wasn't even out of bed while the girls were over here. I'd gesture that anyone else, but for the involved party, would agree with me. Grow up. And learn some manners.
Next, is football. Year after year I find that I love it even more. In previous years, I was never able to just sit and watch a random football game, let aloe get into it. The only games that would excite me would The Badgers, and respectively, the Packers. I'm writing this blog while lounging on the couch watching Denver and Dallas do battle in a preseason game.Right before this game the Steelers played the Redskins. Now, I admit it's on as background noise/distraction, but I'm still kinda getting into it. As for the Badgers, I have no idea when they play, if they have yet, and when their season starts, but I assure you I'd rather watch them than the Packers some days. The Packers had spectacular game last night in which they played particularly well as a team, even with different quarterbacks and other people coming in and out, trying to find a nice rhythm. It was pretty awesome. I only saw the first half, but from what I hear, the whole show was really awesome. I'm reminded a bit of last year for new years when the Packer's whomped on the Bears. As if the holiday weren't sufficient drinking fuel, the Packer's and the Bear's made it twice as jolly. I love this time of year. The weather is finally hinting at a cool-down. I love sweatshirt season. Bowling starts in a few weeks...and we get really lucky when either the Packer game or Badger game is going on DURING bowling. They put up plasma tv's a couple years ago and I love to get into the game and have fun bowling at the same time. This year I can kick back and enjoy a few beers, too. Yay. I'd love to make it to a game in Green Bay. Unfortunately I am poor. However...should anyone feel the need to donate anything to the cause, I'll gladly accept :P
Now onto the boys part. Why, after two years, do I have them crawling ALL OVER?! Yeah, that is correct. I just admitted I've been single (without so much as a kiss on the cheek, mind you) for two full years, almost three now. There are two great guys in La Crosse that want to meet me next weekend. They are both friends of Randee and AJ's and they are both really great guys. Josh has been texting me quite a bit since last night :) Anywho...he's the one that may or may not be there to see me this weekend. He's goin away but depending on when I leave on Sunday, may be back in time to at least meet me. The other one, Ben, is hittin the bars with us. Jen, Randee, and myself are headin out, then AJ, Ben, and some other buddies will be joinin us later on. On top of these two...I went out to Elgin last night to this Cadillac something or other bar place with a huge dance floor...Saturday nights they do country so there were line dancers goin all night. We lost track of time and I got home really late, but now I am getting side-tracked. We met Stephanie's friend Marco down there, and his buddy, Ryne. This guy was pretty cool. Ryne was kinda geeky, but comfortable, talkative, goofy-a bit like me, but more geeky than I like. Anyway, we danced (at which point I had already had two or three beers). The second slow song, he went for it and kissed me. Now, I can't tell you whether I did it because I liked him enough to, or if it was because it has been so fucking long and it was sooooo nice...but I'm leaning towards the later unfortunately. He got my number though so we will see. Josh has my number though, too. And he made the first move, technically! Ugh. Decisions decisons. Just seeing who everyone is right now...getting to know new people. I am going to La Crosse next weekend with an open mind and no attachments.
Now, onto the really touchy topic that has me really really steamed. Wednesday I told Mat that we were going to Kirsch's (the hoity toity restaurant Andrea is now hostessing at) for mom for her birthday, as a surprise, and he agreed. Today while sitting on the couch watching Wild Hogs, he asked if he could borrow it tonight. I'm like yeah, you goin somewhere? I was concerned about him losing a netflix movie. I'm not sure what there policy is on that, but I'll cross that road when I get there. He said Danielle (aka Elle, OTHER Danielle...) wanted him to go over and see her. Ooo as a side note let me mention this crazy bitch lost her license that she's had for a whole year or so...for speeding too many times. Dumbass. As Mat broke up with her on Tuesday, I was confused, but thought it wasn't my business. I don't care about his decisions with girls anymore, they're all the same. I asked him how late he was goin over there because the dinner thing for mom is at 6 (and I'd better wrap it up soon as I have no make up on yet and it's nearly 5:15). He said oh that is tonight isn't it. I assumed he'd call his EX...emphasis on EX...and cancel. Ten minutes later he's tearin down the road in his p.o.s. truck. I thought nothing of it, maybe he had a firecall or had to get gas or something. Turns out, he chose his EX over a dinner for mom's 40th birthday. That's a big birthday. Needless to say she's very upset about it...and I'm just livid. Absolutely livid. My respect for him was teetering on non-existent going into this asshole move, and now there's no doubt it's gone. What a fucking ass. It's your mother's birthday. He aslo had these dinner plans first. But...chose instead, to hang out with his ex girlfriend in Fort Fucking Atkinson. What a dumbass. I told him so, too. and He keeps trying to justify it...that we shoulda reminded him, that it's not his fault, that I'm a bitch, that he simply forgot...I DONT CARE IF YOU FUCKING FORGOT YOU JUST ROYALLY FUCKED UP in choosing youre ex over mom for her birthday. You have got to be kidding me. Dude. He does shit like this all the time. And he is and forever will be, a cocky ass. Mom agreed. So at least there is that, but that is not the point. I can't come up with a word vulgar enough to describe him. I have no words left.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Sentiment
I get in this mood. Sometimes it's random, and sometimes it's because I'm listening to "This Is Love" sung by Kelly Rowland. I get to thinking about how I don't want to all of a sudden realize one day down the road that I am old and no one I love knows how I feel about them. Only...then I remember that they all DO know. It's a fault I guess, if it could be called so...that I make sure people know how I feel about them. Sometimes I think I go on about it too much, but that is better than them not knowing at all. The main people popping into my mind when I say all of this are Cat, Leanne, Randee, Stephanie, Beth, my grandparents, all of my aunts and uncles, my kitties, my cousins..., mainly the first five people I mentioned. I did miss one person...Mike. The one case, in which I told him how I felt, and it made him run for the hills, scared shitless. Telling someone how you feel is supposed to have the opposite affect. He was supposed to be intrigued perhaps, and want to get to know me better...want to chat more. But instead he said "I don't know what to say" and then we signed off for the night and I haven't heard from him in like two months. Why are guys so stupid? I want to slap him almost and tell him to open his eyes and tell him I can be the best thing to ever happen to him, if he would only let me in. Why is it, for guys, that they can flirt with several girls the same way, at the same time...but when a girl has one guy she is really really into, one guy that she would give anything to spend her life with, has to turn chicken? See previous blogs on the subject of Mike for more venting on the issue...before I ramble on and start repeating myself. All I did, long story short, was tell him that I was going to wait for him to go through his Navy time and everything, even if we didn't label a relatonship...I was going to wait for him no matter what...ugh. I digress...
New topic: going to Randee's next weekend! I am going up on Friday around noon, to arrive shortly after 3. If nothing else, the longish drive is always good and cleansing. It is refreshing to just drive by yourself, blarin out the music and passing old people...anywho- I commented one of Randee's pics on myspace and said something like "that guy is hot you need to share" an she actually added him as a friend, so that I could see his profile and stuff...she says he's perfect. Totally causal, outgoing but laid back, really really nice, and not the kind of guy who's in it just for a good lay. So..hitting the bars with a hot guy and a bunch of the girls, what else could I ask for? But then again, I told Mike I'd wait for him. I told him I was going to stay single until he realized how friggin awesome I am. So I need to wait. But...then he decided to not talk to me and avoid me for two months. So what do I do? What if this Ben guy, say, gives me a kiss? Do I kiss him back? What if we dance,is thatokay? Is that betraying devotion to Michael? What do I do? I need opinions here!
New topic: going to Randee's next weekend! I am going up on Friday around noon, to arrive shortly after 3. If nothing else, the longish drive is always good and cleansing. It is refreshing to just drive by yourself, blarin out the music and passing old people...anywho- I commented one of Randee's pics on myspace and said something like "that guy is hot you need to share" an she actually added him as a friend, so that I could see his profile and stuff...she says he's perfect. Totally causal, outgoing but laid back, really really nice, and not the kind of guy who's in it just for a good lay. So..hitting the bars with a hot guy and a bunch of the girls, what else could I ask for? But then again, I told Mike I'd wait for him. I told him I was going to stay single until he realized how friggin awesome I am. So I need to wait. But...then he decided to not talk to me and avoid me for two months. So what do I do? What if this Ben guy, say, gives me a kiss? Do I kiss him back? What if we dance,is thatokay? Is that betraying devotion to Michael? What do I do? I need opinions here!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Good girl gone Madison
So here is a play-by-play of my weekend, sort of.
It started on Thursday. After work I went got get my phone. I got to playing around with it and my texts weren't getting through to people. The only part of my phone that worked was the phone calling part. Go figure, cuz it's a phone. A-duh!! I thought that perhaps I was a Blackberry Dumbass and there was somethin special to do but I wasn't finding it. Before I go too far let me mention first, that on the way back out to my car after the phone purchase, I managed to open the car door into my fucking nose and broke the damn thing. OUUUUCHIES! Now I find myself itching it only to be wincing and stroking it afteward out of pure pain. Yowzahs. After the phone thing I went shopping and got some new pants and shirts. Whoopdeedoo. Moving on.
Friday came too early for my liking but it was my own fault for choosing to pack on Thursday night instead of Wednesday or on Thursday BEFORE my whole four hours of work. Right...8 came and I was out of bed showering. Then I took off for Walmart to buy some shampoo and stuff...after which I went to Cingular again to get the fucking phone thing straightened out. Terrific. Turns out my sales person f'd up and put the PDA media package on instead of the blackberry package *blackberries are apparently special and have their own thing goin on*...now my shit works. Only Andrea dropped it so now I'm tempted to see if they can order a new phone casing. It's brand new and the fucking big ass scratch on the screen is annoying the shit out of me. After Cingular I went to the DMV that to my delight opened at 9. I got a duplicate license because I had been turned down for alcohol on two occassions because my license was vertical rather than horizontal. Though they cannot legally turn me down because of that, whatever I can do to make the alcohol purchasing a faster process, I'm all for it. So I got a new license and the guy at the DMV was trying to tell me that it shouldn't be a problem. Yah, well I don't fuckin care. I gave you my four dollars, give me a new goddamn license, ass hole. It's your job. The whole ordeal was a longer process than it should have been but Tim Sturtevent came to my rescue. I know the guy and he told the dude I was right and that he should not give me an hassle because I'm not the idiot he was proclaiming me to be. It was very disturbing to me that our dmv is full of dumbasses. Never the mind, I got it taken care of. Turns out I only needed it once while in Madison as I was only carded once. Wahoo! I drove up to Madison to arrive shortly after noon. Pulling into the Pippitt driveway I started randomly swearing because I had forgotten to cut flowers from the garden for Cat, and the book I wanted to hand off to her. Though she still hasn't touched The Secret so perhaps it's best to wait, anyway. I got me a good hug and we schlepped up to the Stop N Go for some bus tickets, as we didn't want to fight over who wasn't going to be designated driver...haha. Drinking started around 4 in the afternoon with the Beer Advocates group at Maduro. After about two beers each we decided to hit Natt Spiel because it was a bit too loud and cramped for Jimbo and we were all hungry. The food was amazing. We ate slowly because we were sharing each others' plates. After each bite I wanted to stop because I wanted to keep that taste in my mouth. But...then the other food was calling so we just ate and ate. So good. We gave many thanks to the cook. Good fellow. We found a number 3 bus to take us to Atwood where we would find the Glass Nickel after at least a half hour of walking in the right direction...turning around because we thought it might be wrong...finally calling 411 and finding out we were right first but hadn't gone far enough....all of that for a beer. It went down really really well after all of that tredging around matresses and shit laying in the sidewalk to GET to the bar. We took the 3 back to the square and the 70 back to Middleton. At that point I had a very terrible headache and wasn't being good company so I called it an early 10:00 night.
Woke up Saturday morning feeling as brilliant as ever, but it was a rough night. Cat felt grainy in the morning so we opted out of a bike ride on an iffy battery...and tried for some Frisbee Golf. That was a no-go...so off to the market for more weird beer, though there was more than enough waiting at home to get sufficiently shit-faced, if you will. We packed up some bread and beer into a cooler and drove to Devils Lake for one of the most magnificent days I've had in a very long time. We chose a shaded picnic bench for some good people watching, bread and sausage, and six beers. Haha...oops. After we had finished all six beers and the food, we put the cooler back into the truck, and climbed our way up the bluff to Balanced Rock. It was a wonderful seven hundred feet or so up in a relatively short amount of time. Jim got some brilliant photos and just before we got to the top, I suddenly couldn't go any further. I said so, and they happily obliged to a turn around. I made it another hundred feet or so before I needed a break. My legs were shaking so horribly (possibly from lack of nutrition) that I felt uncomfortable going on without falling from rubbery legs. It was a very odd sensation I had never felt to such an extreme before. We did climb pretty fast and I'm ashamed that my otherwise reliable legs let me down, but we did what we had to in order to make sure we got down safely. I was sorry to turn the whole group around on account of me, but they did not mind. In fact, they were proud of me for speaking up and saying I couldn't go on if I wanted to get back down. I was glad for that because I felt horrible about it as we were so near the top. I would have gladly waited while they climbed the rest of the way and came back for me on the way down. They weren't havin it though. They wanted to stick with Rin-baby. I felt very very loved and Jim was very concerned so we took the trip down at my pace. Which, may have been slow but as I was so unsteady, each step down had to be with sure footing. I had hoped that up on reaching the ground again, my legs would de-wobbletize themselves, however they did not. It felt like learning to walk again. My knees would randomly give out, and if for a split second I was still rather than taking a step immediately after the other, my legs would shake terribly agian. That proceeded into the night but I managed not to complain about it any further as I felt horrible for causing any sort of ordeal in the first place, and I am not generally an on-the-spot comlainer. That is not the kind of attention I want to attract. We made a fantastic supper of grilled pizza with toppings like tomato, red pepper, taso (I haven't a clue how to spell that), cheese..ya know...just stuff. We had some Boudin to nibble on while we made the Palenta and Broccoli dishes. Uh-maaazing. With proper instruction, I can be a pretty awesome kitchen hand. I pretty much made that Broccoli thing on my own and it was so wonderful. And delightfully simple, as well! MMmmm so good. It was all delicious. More beers followed later that night when we switched the Packer game at half time, to Time Bandits. A ridiculous film that I'll probably never watch again, ever, but admittedly enjoyed while we watched it. Before bed, Cat declared herself hammered, and halfway through brushing her teeth, got the hiccups. It was hilarious. I tried to get a fabulous hug that I can only give, and get from her, and all the while she was hiccuping and giggle loudly in my ear, so I gave up. Oh well. She was so funny. She ran into the wall once,...and while I was brushing my own teeth she made a point of standing in the bathroom door...and I happened to turn and watch her just in time to see her bra come flying out from under her shirt. She proceeded to scratch the hell out of herself and I laughed so hard I had to spit out the toothpaste to keep from doing a toothpaste "spit take." Haha! Sorry if that was too much info for anyone, and Cat, should you wish for me to take that bit out of the blog, please tell me, and I'll gladly edit that bit out.
Sunday morning I woke to sunshine. Cat had herself another hangover. I watched some of the Sopranos with her while Jimbo mowed the lawn. He hopped into the shower while I got all of my stuff together and packed it up into my car. Cat gave me a hug and a flipper-oo of the cars so i could get out, and I was on my way. My calves aren't sore until I stretch them out. Pushing on them, they are fine, it's the stretching that is painful. Do not mistake that for complaining. Sore muscles rock. I welcome the soreness of muscles. It means you worked em good n hard and burned a fuckin shitload of caloris and toned muscle, all at once. Brilliant. I got home and met Omar...a foreign exchange student from Turkey. As it turns out he is a pretty decent volleyball player and we had fun with him. We decided to play at the mill pond, so we could jump around in the water in between games. It was lovely but I was only good for two games. I was planning on doing more but that second time of going into the water I just couldn't get out. It was too refreshing and I got to move my legs around in a way you can't do unless you're under water. I drove Omar home *grandma and grandpa have him for two weeks. they are his welcoming family*. I sat there with them for a half hour, and then headed tot he bowling alley for the Sunday Couples meeting. That starts in a few weeks already...the Sunday after Labor Day. Oh joy. After that I headed to the ballpark to spend my last Sunday evening with Leanne. It was the championship playoffs night. Last week they had four games to determine what four would proceed to this week. There were two games to decide who would play against each other for the final game, so two teams had to play twice tonight. The team I wanted to win, didn't...as their pitcher was WAY off of his game. I have never seen such a horrible pitching performance and I felt bad for him. He pitched about 15 runs in one inning....13 of which were walks because he couldn't pitch a damn strike. Poor guy. He lost it and they tried a couple of other guys at pitcher. It's alright...there is always next year. The team that won the championship game is new to the league this year so that was a bit exciting, but a bit of a downer as well. I wanted the other team to win. I know half of them...two I went to school with, one was a father of a classmate, and one other was a brother of that classmate's father...and a few others I knew, as well. It's alright. It's a game without any cash rewards or anything. Leanne and I are going to have the remainder of this month as a break before bowling season starts up again. What a long fucking season. I'm both dreading and looking forward to it. Most of the looking forward to part is because State was so awesome that I can't wait to do it again!
And now for something completely different...*forgive me, I stole that line from Monty Python...my nose hurts and I just sneezed about four or five times and I have now have a bloody mess to clean up. I'll talk to yall later and I hope you enjoyed reading about my delightful weekend. I hope I will have some pictures to post soon, but until then, this will have to do! Night everyone, and have a good week!
It started on Thursday. After work I went got get my phone. I got to playing around with it and my texts weren't getting through to people. The only part of my phone that worked was the phone calling part. Go figure, cuz it's a phone. A-duh!! I thought that perhaps I was a Blackberry Dumbass and there was somethin special to do but I wasn't finding it. Before I go too far let me mention first, that on the way back out to my car after the phone purchase, I managed to open the car door into my fucking nose and broke the damn thing. OUUUUCHIES! Now I find myself itching it only to be wincing and stroking it afteward out of pure pain. Yowzahs. After the phone thing I went shopping and got some new pants and shirts. Whoopdeedoo. Moving on.
Friday came too early for my liking but it was my own fault for choosing to pack on Thursday night instead of Wednesday or on Thursday BEFORE my whole four hours of work. Right...8 came and I was out of bed showering. Then I took off for Walmart to buy some shampoo and stuff...after which I went to Cingular again to get the fucking phone thing straightened out. Terrific. Turns out my sales person f'd up and put the PDA media package on instead of the blackberry package *blackberries are apparently special and have their own thing goin on*...now my shit works. Only Andrea dropped it so now I'm tempted to see if they can order a new phone casing. It's brand new and the fucking big ass scratch on the screen is annoying the shit out of me. After Cingular I went to the DMV that to my delight opened at 9. I got a duplicate license because I had been turned down for alcohol on two occassions because my license was vertical rather than horizontal. Though they cannot legally turn me down because of that, whatever I can do to make the alcohol purchasing a faster process, I'm all for it. So I got a new license and the guy at the DMV was trying to tell me that it shouldn't be a problem. Yah, well I don't fuckin care. I gave you my four dollars, give me a new goddamn license, ass hole. It's your job. The whole ordeal was a longer process than it should have been but Tim Sturtevent came to my rescue. I know the guy and he told the dude I was right and that he should not give me an hassle because I'm not the idiot he was proclaiming me to be. It was very disturbing to me that our dmv is full of dumbasses. Never the mind, I got it taken care of. Turns out I only needed it once while in Madison as I was only carded once. Wahoo! I drove up to Madison to arrive shortly after noon. Pulling into the Pippitt driveway I started randomly swearing because I had forgotten to cut flowers from the garden for Cat, and the book I wanted to hand off to her. Though she still hasn't touched The Secret so perhaps it's best to wait, anyway. I got me a good hug and we schlepped up to the Stop N Go for some bus tickets, as we didn't want to fight over who wasn't going to be designated driver...haha. Drinking started around 4 in the afternoon with the Beer Advocates group at Maduro. After about two beers each we decided to hit Natt Spiel because it was a bit too loud and cramped for Jimbo and we were all hungry. The food was amazing. We ate slowly because we were sharing each others' plates. After each bite I wanted to stop because I wanted to keep that taste in my mouth. But...then the other food was calling so we just ate and ate. So good. We gave many thanks to the cook. Good fellow. We found a number 3 bus to take us to Atwood where we would find the Glass Nickel after at least a half hour of walking in the right direction...turning around because we thought it might be wrong...finally calling 411 and finding out we were right first but hadn't gone far enough....all of that for a beer. It went down really really well after all of that tredging around matresses and shit laying in the sidewalk to GET to the bar. We took the 3 back to the square and the 70 back to Middleton. At that point I had a very terrible headache and wasn't being good company so I called it an early 10:00 night.
Woke up Saturday morning feeling as brilliant as ever, but it was a rough night. Cat felt grainy in the morning so we opted out of a bike ride on an iffy battery...and tried for some Frisbee Golf. That was a no-go...so off to the market for more weird beer, though there was more than enough waiting at home to get sufficiently shit-faced, if you will. We packed up some bread and beer into a cooler and drove to Devils Lake for one of the most magnificent days I've had in a very long time. We chose a shaded picnic bench for some good people watching, bread and sausage, and six beers. Haha...oops. After we had finished all six beers and the food, we put the cooler back into the truck, and climbed our way up the bluff to Balanced Rock. It was a wonderful seven hundred feet or so up in a relatively short amount of time. Jim got some brilliant photos and just before we got to the top, I suddenly couldn't go any further. I said so, and they happily obliged to a turn around. I made it another hundred feet or so before I needed a break. My legs were shaking so horribly (possibly from lack of nutrition) that I felt uncomfortable going on without falling from rubbery legs. It was a very odd sensation I had never felt to such an extreme before. We did climb pretty fast and I'm ashamed that my otherwise reliable legs let me down, but we did what we had to in order to make sure we got down safely. I was sorry to turn the whole group around on account of me, but they did not mind. In fact, they were proud of me for speaking up and saying I couldn't go on if I wanted to get back down. I was glad for that because I felt horrible about it as we were so near the top. I would have gladly waited while they climbed the rest of the way and came back for me on the way down. They weren't havin it though. They wanted to stick with Rin-baby. I felt very very loved and Jim was very concerned so we took the trip down at my pace. Which, may have been slow but as I was so unsteady, each step down had to be with sure footing. I had hoped that up on reaching the ground again, my legs would de-wobbletize themselves, however they did not. It felt like learning to walk again. My knees would randomly give out, and if for a split second I was still rather than taking a step immediately after the other, my legs would shake terribly agian. That proceeded into the night but I managed not to complain about it any further as I felt horrible for causing any sort of ordeal in the first place, and I am not generally an on-the-spot comlainer. That is not the kind of attention I want to attract. We made a fantastic supper of grilled pizza with toppings like tomato, red pepper, taso (I haven't a clue how to spell that), cheese..ya know...just stuff. We had some Boudin to nibble on while we made the Palenta and Broccoli dishes. Uh-maaazing. With proper instruction, I can be a pretty awesome kitchen hand. I pretty much made that Broccoli thing on my own and it was so wonderful. And delightfully simple, as well! MMmmm so good. It was all delicious. More beers followed later that night when we switched the Packer game at half time, to Time Bandits. A ridiculous film that I'll probably never watch again, ever, but admittedly enjoyed while we watched it. Before bed, Cat declared herself hammered, and halfway through brushing her teeth, got the hiccups. It was hilarious. I tried to get a fabulous hug that I can only give, and get from her, and all the while she was hiccuping and giggle loudly in my ear, so I gave up. Oh well. She was so funny. She ran into the wall once,...and while I was brushing my own teeth she made a point of standing in the bathroom door...and I happened to turn and watch her just in time to see her bra come flying out from under her shirt. She proceeded to scratch the hell out of herself and I laughed so hard I had to spit out the toothpaste to keep from doing a toothpaste "spit take." Haha! Sorry if that was too much info for anyone, and Cat, should you wish for me to take that bit out of the blog, please tell me, and I'll gladly edit that bit out.
Sunday morning I woke to sunshine. Cat had herself another hangover. I watched some of the Sopranos with her while Jimbo mowed the lawn. He hopped into the shower while I got all of my stuff together and packed it up into my car. Cat gave me a hug and a flipper-oo of the cars so i could get out, and I was on my way. My calves aren't sore until I stretch them out. Pushing on them, they are fine, it's the stretching that is painful. Do not mistake that for complaining. Sore muscles rock. I welcome the soreness of muscles. It means you worked em good n hard and burned a fuckin shitload of caloris and toned muscle, all at once. Brilliant. I got home and met Omar...a foreign exchange student from Turkey. As it turns out he is a pretty decent volleyball player and we had fun with him. We decided to play at the mill pond, so we could jump around in the water in between games. It was lovely but I was only good for two games. I was planning on doing more but that second time of going into the water I just couldn't get out. It was too refreshing and I got to move my legs around in a way you can't do unless you're under water. I drove Omar home *grandma and grandpa have him for two weeks. they are his welcoming family*. I sat there with them for a half hour, and then headed tot he bowling alley for the Sunday Couples meeting. That starts in a few weeks already...the Sunday after Labor Day. Oh joy. After that I headed to the ballpark to spend my last Sunday evening with Leanne. It was the championship playoffs night. Last week they had four games to determine what four would proceed to this week. There were two games to decide who would play against each other for the final game, so two teams had to play twice tonight. The team I wanted to win, didn't...as their pitcher was WAY off of his game. I have never seen such a horrible pitching performance and I felt bad for him. He pitched about 15 runs in one inning....13 of which were walks because he couldn't pitch a damn strike. Poor guy. He lost it and they tried a couple of other guys at pitcher. It's alright...there is always next year. The team that won the championship game is new to the league this year so that was a bit exciting, but a bit of a downer as well. I wanted the other team to win. I know half of them...two I went to school with, one was a father of a classmate, and one other was a brother of that classmate's father...and a few others I knew, as well. It's alright. It's a game without any cash rewards or anything. Leanne and I are going to have the remainder of this month as a break before bowling season starts up again. What a long fucking season. I'm both dreading and looking forward to it. Most of the looking forward to part is because State was so awesome that I can't wait to do it again!
And now for something completely different...*forgive me, I stole that line from Monty Python...my nose hurts and I just sneezed about four or five times and I have now have a bloody mess to clean up. I'll talk to yall later and I hope you enjoyed reading about my delightful weekend. I hope I will have some pictures to post soon, but until then, this will have to do! Night everyone, and have a good week!
Saturday, August 4, 2007
S.O.S.
S.O.S.=Saturday Out with Stephanie. It was rockin. Myspace pics to follow shortly...we decided, fuck it. We're gonna take a bunch of pictures no matter how ridiculous...to celebrate that I made it through another month end, and that my girl had Saturday off of work for the first time in like five months. First we went to Applebee's where I had some sorta Margarita. They did it right and put salt on the rim. It wasn't a margarita glass but I'll let it slide. We ate then we walked around in the mall and I bought stuff....lol. Then we went bowling and for having not bowled in three months, my thumb now hurts somethin fierce, and my arm will be sore tomorrow. At the bowling alley, I had a UV and lemondae, and two Corona's and after all of that I was FINALLY buzzin. Then we ate some popcorn, which I am pissed at myself for now. I'm trying to continue LOSING weight, not gaining it...and it wasn't even remotely close to being hungry so I don't know why I was eating. Then Ryan yelled at me because I didn't know what the tidal wave shot was. I said I'll try it and he said, "you're lucky I've known you for so long otherwise I'd actually do it." Apparently they give you a shot of UV, then spray you with club soda from the fountain guns. Fucker...he's like you must not be an experienced drinker if you don't know what that is. I said, hey now listen here retard, you're BARELY 19, don't be judgin me! Plus, I tended bar for two years and you're just starting, get of our high horse over knowing something that I didn't. Fucker. He was always stuck up growing up.
So here I am now. I came home to a comment from my favorite person and it made me think of next weekend when I get to spend some time with her! Yay me! Then I realized...wtf was the point of takin a half day Thursday for choir practice if I can't go to church because I'll be in Madison. Dumbass. Haha oh well. Now I need to calm down, get my vision back a little, take out my contacts and my face and get ready for la cama. I'm tired and I worked my butt off today...then STILL spent the whole afternoon and evening with Stephanie, without a nap, mind you. I did get a shower in, but no nap. So I want sleep and if I don't get it soon, the first person to talk to me tomorrow is gonna regret it cuz I'll probably bite their head off from crabbiness. So...goodnight everyone, and Cat, I will see you in like five days! WAH-HOOO! FINally.
Peace everyone.
So here I am now. I came home to a comment from my favorite person and it made me think of next weekend when I get to spend some time with her! Yay me! Then I realized...wtf was the point of takin a half day Thursday for choir practice if I can't go to church because I'll be in Madison. Dumbass. Haha oh well. Now I need to calm down, get my vision back a little, take out my contacts and my face and get ready for la cama. I'm tired and I worked my butt off today...then STILL spent the whole afternoon and evening with Stephanie, without a nap, mind you. I did get a shower in, but no nap. So I want sleep and if I don't get it soon, the first person to talk to me tomorrow is gonna regret it cuz I'll probably bite their head off from crabbiness. So...goodnight everyone, and Cat, I will see you in like five days! WAH-HOOO! FINally.
Peace everyone.
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